Pleasure and Pain
by Rick Wagner
October 12, 1995

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Dedicated to Len Yanavich who's initials were tatooed to my left arm thinking that I had found the right person to spend the rest of my life with. His alcoholism destroyed our home, our love, and now I have a black triangle covering those letters. The broken dreams and wisdom learned will stay with me for the rest of my life.
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Your caring could lighten my life
but your ways cut just like a knife
right to the vary core of my soul

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again

How I loved to be loved as never before
with my head in the clouds
or my face to the floor

Your passion is heightened
as my ego gets frightened

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again

Like a little school boy in a loosing fight
I tried to resist you with all of my might

But nothing felt better as the night turned to day
and we made passionate love in our own special way

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again

How you loved me intensely
but you hurt me immensely

With a careless remark
Like a dog that would bark
Obscenities throughout the night

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again

Someday you'll understand
I was really a sensitive man
and the hard exterior shell
was simply a facade from hell

My heart was soft and it needed attention
injured with a look, a word
Or just a mention

I've given it all as I'd done before
with the condition that you'd nurture
from now till nevermore

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again

How I wish you could see
that there's more to the eye
and understand that I loved you
without a cynical reply...

Your love made me crazy
and I continually tried to cope
but I'm alone and I'm hurting
at the end of my rope

Just once let me hear you say it
With no strings attached
That you loved me entirely
That your love wasn't matched.

Then the pain and the heartache would melt into space
and I'd know that I'm human
with purpose and a place

Till then I'll just wait and let the time pass
as your words and actions cut
like pointed shards of glass

Someday you'll learn that I loved you
although cool to the touch
there's a raging bonfire
that loved you so much

Like a breath of fresh air
during a cool summer rain

Pleasure and Pain
There,
I've said it again................